Bringing Dishes to Share at Thanksgiving Dinner

[SparkleNana]

Today, I read the recent issue of "Real Simple" magazine at the library. There was an article about "making Thanksgiving easier on the Hostess". It suggested asking guests to bring specific things. Which seems fine and normal -- especially when the guests are family and/or friends. Although I think it is nice when people have choice in the items they bring.

The writer of the article suggested selecting recipes for the side dishes for the dinner. And then, saying something like "I have a recipe for a dish that would go really well with our Thanksgiving menu. Would you like to prepare it?"

How would you feel if your hostess asked you that question? Personally, I would feel pressured into making the "new recipe". And I would be very nervous that it wouldn't turn out well. I am not sure I would like to participate in such a "controlled" event as that Thanksgiving dinner.

I would much prefer to make something that I do well and is traditional -- or buy something -- like delicious pies from a good bakery.

What do you think?

If I am hostess - I do love it if people ask if they can bring things to Thanksgiving dinner. And - they tell me what they want to contribute. But it is what THEY want to contribute. Not what I try to "force them" to contribute.

 

[aggy]

We are doing something like that this year. Except the hostess asked us to bring a dish that we made that she loved. Like she asked if I could make the crab stuffing and the rolls. I don't think I would make a dish that I'd never made before. I would have to decline - in a nice way. I would explain that I don't feel comfortable. What if it turned out bad? What if noone liked it?

 

[luludou]

For our Boobash everyone offered to bring something... so they had a choice, dips & veggies, salad, side-dish or dessert but no specific recipe - and if they want to bring something else, fine with me!

 

[girlsinmo]

I'd probably say I'd prefer to bring something I know I prepare well. Or I might decide I didn't want to go to that dinner. Sounds a little stuffy to me.

 

[Lana]

I always have Christmas Eve and people bring side dishes but they usually say what do you need. Now it is such a routine that people normally do the same thing every year.

I always try new recipes out when a group will be somewhere. (like at funerals for church or for work)

I do not go anywhere that a hostess would ask me to bring a new dish. We all make our regulars.

 

[Merry]

I don't think I would feel comfortable preparing a new dish and contributing it to a special holiday meal such as Thanksgiving. If it was a very informal gathering and everyone else was bring new dishes, perhaps I would be OK with it. But Thanksgiving, a new dish which would reflect me... I don't think so. Right now, I don't think I know anyone who would invite me and make such a request, but I think If it did happen would be honest with the hostess and tell her what I prepare best.

 

[Belles]

I always host Thanksgiving in our family and everyone knows even before I call what they will be bringing; we all have our own specialties. However if I did want to change up the menu a bit and throw in a new recipe I know who I could ask and who not to. Some of my sister in laws are little more adventurous and enjoy being in the kitchen more then others. It just depends on who you are asking I think.

 

[teachermomof2]

I wouldn't want to be told specifically what to bring, but I'd be okay with bring a veggie or dessert or whatever.

 

[AuntJamelle]

Everyone has shared some good thoughts on this. I can only chime in and say that I have always preferred to give guests categories I need an item in and then letting them choose a recipe within that realm. Like an appetizer or a side dish using a green veggie, etc.

That is, IF they don't already have a specialty item they usually bring or something new they've tried and are excited to make again.

If I am the one bringing something, I don't think I'd be comfortable making a recipe I've never made before - UNLESS it looked really simple and really good. But it would really depend.

If someone asked me to make something specific and I wasn't comfortable with it, I would probably just try and talk to the hostess and explain my worries. Hopefully something can always be worked out!

 

[LadyEvenstar]

I certainly wouldn't feel comfortable giving my guests such specific instructions on what to bring to a dinner at my home. If they asked what they could bring, I'd leave it up to them or say something like "a desset" or "a side." If I felt that I had give out recipes and tell my guests to make what I wanted, I'd rethink hosting that year.

If a hostess asked me to bring something to the diner, of course, I'd be happy to but I'd like to choose what I bring (checking to see if it would work, of course). I'd also be flattered and happy if they asked me to bring something I freuently make that they like.

The whole scenario just seems a bit controlling and presumptuous if the "hostess" assignes "guests" recipres which she would like to see prepared. I really wouldn't feel comfortable with that.

 

[iluv2scrap]

I wouldnt feel comfortable with that at all. I agree with offering to bring something and being told a category but not a specific item and when we host and people offer i tell them to bring whatever they would like.

 

[Cathymac]

I have to agree with all of you. Although we potluck both of our Thanksgivings (we have 40 or more at my mom's gathering, around 25 at our house on Saturday after for DH's family) we also give "catagories" and let our guests choose what to bring. Sometimes it's as loose as "bring a veggie" or "bring dessert"...sometimes it's "bring your famous pecan pie" or "how about that good corn pudding you do"..and sometimes it's just "bring anything you'd like to bring". But it's never "bring this dish and here's the recipe". I would be so uncomfortable doing that. On the other hand, it doesn't bother me to do it the other way..with that many folks, it's important to take the help when it's offered.

Obviously the writer of that article must not be southern-we KNOW how to do a potluck!! LOL!!

 

[SparkleNana]

You are so right, CathyMac! Potlucks are about sharing and helping and working together and cooperating and all kinds of wonderful, loving things! "Control" just is not part of it to me! And "giving someone a recipe to make" is just really cold to me!

Long live potlucks -- in the warm, loving, sharing "southern" way!!!

 

[grandma bucket]

We have had the same crowd for Thanksgiving for so many years, we all bring the same dishes every year. I am apple pie, sweet potato casserole and the relish tray.

I think it is rather rude to ask a guest to make a specific dish. Unless it's a request for a dish that they are known for.

After my mother passed away my sister and I co-hosted Thanksgiving. When people asked what to bring we usually told them what we were making or what other people were going to bring and they could take it from there.