I have a fear of disappointing people or doing something that will cause people to be upset with me. I will put them over me. Sometimes it is necessary like dealing with the needs of a young child or the needs of elderly people. This is not what I'm talking about. It's the "not standing up for me" and what I want so that I don't disappoint people. I've come a long way with that but I recently saw something about myself where I need to do better.
I have covered for people for too long. I am now including the "covered people" in emails expressing that I wasn't told, I hadn't heard back, etc. It's amazing what happens when I do that. I actually get responses.
For months I've sent out emails regarding board meetings and follow-ups to the board meetings. That is my job as the board secretary. Three people in particular have issues with responding. I don't know why they are on the board if they aren't doing anything. Anyway, one of those three showed up, for the first time since August, at a recent meeting and sheepishly apologized for never getting back to me since August. "Yeah, the ball was in your court." I told him. He hasn't done any follow up with me on that issue he was supposed to deal with in August. We have a board meeting on Tuesday. Sigh...
The other two people have not shown up since July to the meeting. I get no responses when I send out the reminders, etc. So in a group email conversation which they were included in, I said wrote out both of their names and said that they were not going to be at this Tuesday's meeting. You know what, that comment light some fire under them because they actually responded that they are going to be at the meeting. ROFLOL! Now I know that if I want something done or at least a response, no more Mrs. Nice Guy-Who-Tip-Toes-Around-Board-Members-Because-They-Are-Well-Known-People-in-Certain-Circles. I'm calling people out in a group email if that is what it takes to get a response. Their behaviour is more disappointing and upsetting to me than me calling them out on it. That email has freed me from so much fear of disappointing/upsetting people.