Dear Friends & Forum Members

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by happy2bme, Aug 18, 2015.

  1. happy2bme

    happy2bme Well-Known Member

    It has come to my attention that one of our members has chosen not to be active on this forum anymore because of some of my posts of recent months regarding the difficulty my family has been having with my son.

    I wish SparkleNana would have reached out to me to discuss her discontent as I would have apologized for offending and upsetting her. Sadly, she will be missed, but she has to do what she feels is best for her.

    I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't live in a world that is all roses and sunshine. I live in realty and sometimes reality bites. HARD.

    This past year has been the most difficult of my life. To watch your child turn into someone you don't even recognize, to see them take everything you have taught them and throw it all away is heartbreaking. We haven't spoken to Grayson in weeks, he wants nothing to do with us. The pain is excruciating, but we have to move on.

    I have shared everything that has happened with Grayson these last few months because that is what we do here. We share the good, the bad and the ugly. This is where we come when our husbands die or get deployed, we get cancer, we lose our jobs, we have problems with our families, neighbors & friends. We also come here to celebrate new babies, new grand babies, new homes, new pets and anything else that is going on in our lives.

    We do this because this forum and the Chit Chat thread are a place of friendship, comfort, respect, safety and security. We can say things here when we have no other place to say them; knowing that we won't be judged or ridiculed. We can rant, rave and let off steam because sometimes we have to get the bad thoughts out of our heads and our hearts in order to stay sane and move on.

    Some of us have been together since 2007 when Gingerbug started this forum and some of us even before that at Organized Christmas. That is a long time to be together and I think it is only fitting that this forum and the Chit Chat thread would take a more intimate tone. You can't be together as long as we have and not let it get personal.

    I will wrap this up by saying that if I have upset or offended anyone else on this forum and you are considering leaving because of it, please have the courage to contact me and tell me. I will delete my account rather than have anyone else leave because of anything I have said.

    Thank you.
     
    Last edited: Aug 18, 2015
  2. sweetpumkinpye

    sweetpumkinpye Well-Known Member

    Mel,
    It was very brave of you to write that.
    Totally agree with what you have written. I personally share with you girls, my MHH family, things that I have not told others. Maybe it is the anominity or maybe it is because none of our lives are perfect, we all have our trials and I know that I will not be judged.
    This is a place that we share so many things and I am pleased to be able to share our lives, good and bad with you all. Sometimes we do not agree with each other, that happens in every family but we truly care for each other which is an amazing thing.
    Who would have thought that a group of girls, who have never met each other would strike up such amazing friendships?
     
  3. luludou

    luludou Well-Known Member

    I agree this is a place where we have made wonderful friends. I have been on other forums (awhile back) and people are NOT nice to each other whereas this place is a GOOD place. I know the chit-chat thread is more personal and might make some people feel awkward... then skip that thread. ALL the other threads are dedicated to Christmas and we love them all. A chit-chat thread just happened overtime and I personally wouldn't live without it.
    We all have different opinions and ideas but we have learned to share and support each other.
     
  4. angelpugs

    angelpugs Active Member

    Luludou,i agree with you all,this is a wonderful place and yes,it's filled with many friends who over the years have become a family and it's nice to be able to have the girls to talk to,to vent,to get that little extra support.I will agree on our lives are no bed of roses,there is no such thing as perfect family,perfect life,the world has taken quite a change over the years.Well,all i would like to say is,it's nice to be able to come here sit down and enjoy this family time that we somehow have managed to build,Thank You All for being such wonderful and caring persons.
     
  5. Pam Spaur

    Pam Spaur Well-Known Member

    The one thing I would like to add to what has been said is that we have become a family here at MHH. There is no such thing as a perfect family. I know that all too well. I didn't speak to my biological sister for three years at one time! But, for the sake of our dad, I made up with her. It wasn't easy. Life isn't easy. But, we are family.

    I come here because I know that there is love here. I gripe, whine, complain, cry a lot this year, and what do I get in return? FAMILY! I don't know what I would do without all of you. You are my sisters. You hold me up when I am so low that I can't do for myself. You celebrate times when I am happy, and let me brag on my grandkids. We share details of our lives with each other. Why? Why do we do these things? Because we are family. There is love here. And I, for one, am so grateful for this family filled with love. I couldn't live without any of you.
     
  6. Pam Spaur

    Pam Spaur Well-Known Member

    Angel pugs, you and I were writing and posting at the same time with very similar thoughts.
     
  7. sweetpumkinpye

    sweetpumkinpye Well-Known Member

    Love you Pam.
     
  8. tanya

    tanya Well-Known Member

    In the grand scheme of things I am pretty new here.

    I really like the chit chat thread. I love reading about everyone's days, plans, hope and dreams. I like reading about kids, grand kids, MIL's (although I'm kind of glad I don't have one), pets and what ever else goes on in our lives. I like celebrating when things go right or something good happens. I like to be able to say of I have had a yukky day.

    I have been made to feel welcome here- although I am a newcomer. I like the quiet time in my mornings when the rest of the house is quiet and I can grab my coffee and check in to see how everyone else is and what has happened in their day.

    I love that I can come here and say hi to everyone. I love that everyone has different opinions and I love that people care genuinely about others.
     
  9. angelpugs

    angelpugs Active Member

    Ooops sorry Pam,as i ham a member to many sites and some i really don't go to anymore but,when i come here it's different,there is a different feel,if that makes any sense,and your right Pam.We have quite an amazing family here and each day coming here well,it's like christmas as each day you unwrap a gift,that precious gift of family and which has been stated we are more of a family here,and i for one feel truly blessed.I'm looking forward to enjoying our Merry Holiday's Together!
     
  10. Ahorsesoul

    Ahorsesoul Santa's Elves

    Excellent!
     
  11. teachermomof2

    teachermomof2 Santa's Elves

    Thank you Mel.
     
  12. Snowey

    Snowey Active Member

    :grouphug:
     
  13. Lana

    Lana Well-Known Member

    I also enjoy coming here to see how my MHH Family is. At work I may mention something about somebody and they pretty well know that it is my Christmas Friends. I say Diedra from WI, when talking of the ones from Canada I say above New York over that way or above Montana (I may be wrong on my here abouts with you guys tho), Pam IN, Lisa PA, Annie AZ, Jessica who is with the service etc...... I also enjoy hearing about peoples days. I always have extra prayers for you all here. I do believe by being personal it has made us able to form our family on here to know others deal with life obstacles too!
     
  14. snowlvr

    snowlvr Active Member

    I could not agree more-(I posted most of my thoughts in the daily thread-hadn't got to this one yet!) I have been here since 2007, and before on Organized home..I want a place to come to where I am not judged for being crazy over the holidays, and organizing, and crafts, and EVERYTHING we talk about here!

    I think what makes me the saddest about losing SN is she never hid her age, and it always gave me alot of joy to see that she was living life everyday to the absolute fullest and was funny and kind, and always honest, even when things were rocky in her world too..that even into our 70's we can still be insanely busy, and crazy about the holidays-I will miss that...

    I love you all. I enjoy your posts every single one. I makes me, and I think the rest of us, feel a little less alone facing the big ole world. You have made me laugh EVERY day, cry sometimes, but always always made me feel you are my friends. I am grateful and blessed to have you and this place.
     
  15. happy2bme

    happy2bme Well-Known Member

    Good evening everyone,

    I have had a lot of time to think about what has happened here since yesterday and while the shock is subsiding, the hurt has not.

    SparkleNana's vicious attack on me was inappropriate and uncalled for. It was also very inaccurate. I do not home school my children as they are both high school graduates. My children attended public school for the last 6 years of their academic careers. In the future, if anyone wants to maliciously slander me, make sure you have your facts straight.

    A lot of my friends here have said that SparkleNana's post spoke more of her than it did of me. I don't know what is going on in her life that would make her lash out the way she did and quite frankly, I don't care.

    After much consideration, I will NOT be leaving the forum. I am not throwing away over a decade worth of friendship because of one person's self-righteous ignorance.

    However, I will not put myself in the position of being ambushed ever again. Nor will I be accused of "getting carried away with the conversation" - whatever that means.

    So, I will no longer be posting anything personal about my life. There will be no mention of my family, my health, my house and land, my problems or any of my adventures. I will stick to the general activities of my daily life. If Pam behaves herself, I will post the occasional photo of Beau.

    I will be here to support, celebrate & encourage all my friends and look forward to reading what they have to share and of course, I am always happy to talk about the holidays, but that will be it.

    I have a blog and from now on, that is where I will be doing my sharing; it is where I feel the safest now. If anyone dares attack me, all I have to do is hit the DELETE button.

    So, stop by my blog if you want to see what I am up to. I will still be here posting, so feel free to PM me anytime and if anyone wants to exchange email addresses, that is cool too.

    Good night.



     
  16. sweetpumkinpye

    sweetpumkinpye Well-Known Member

    Glad to see that you are staying with us, it would break my heart to see you go.
    Look forward to you posting and I will be excited to visit your blog and keep up with your adventures.
     
  17. luludou

    luludou Well-Known Member

    Mel, loved your message. I find it sad you won't be posting personals but I will follow you on your blog :) Glad you have decided to stay with us.
     
  18. AuntJamelle

    AuntJamelle Well-Known Member

    Mel - First of all, just (((HUGS)))

    Completely respect your decision as far as posting - and so glad you will still be on the forums!

    I guess I must have missed the threads mentioned - I try to keep up on the Chit Chat threads but they often get away from me. I did see a couple things here and there that made me wonder, but in any case!

    I echo everyone's thoughts on how grateful I am to have this forum and all of you wonderful, crazy, awesome Christmas lovers!!! I've been here since 2007 as well and before that on the OC.

    I've learned SO much from everyone and this special place on the web probably has a bigger impact on my life than even I realize.

    Real life does throw some awful things at us sometimes, or it can feel like all the time. How we choose to deal with it, work with it, rise above it, move past it, that's the real trick. This forum IS special because the norm here is kindness - and understanding. As others have noted, that is not what you typically find in online forums.

    Feeling attacked in what has always been a place of safety can really do a number on you.

    So (((hugs))) to everybody! I love all of you even though we have never met. You are my sisters, aunts, cousins, and mothers - and brothers! lol

    I "lost" my own parents years ago and have one sister and one sister-of-the-heart. We try to keep in touch but it is always a challenge. The ability to be part of this community is priceless to me - so I'm tearing up and I'm just going to stop now. I obviously need some more coffee...and maybe some chocolate...
     
  19. snowlvr

    snowlvr Active Member

    So glad you are staying Mel. Hugs, hugs and more hugs! Happy you are still blogging-looking forward to keeping up-so excited about your house!
     
  20. Becca

    Becca New Member

    Mel.. HUGS...
    I have to say.. I am a real hit and miss on here, but you guys know, im one of the close to original and i have made friendships that are stronger than some friendships of people I see everyday. I have always known, I am loved and welcomed back whenever I feel I need these loving arms around me.

    Having said that I too will miss SN, but.. the Chit Chat thread is just that.. always has been and hopefully always will be....Lord knows, i am one to spill my guts more than anyone else. I wear my heart on my sleeve and Thank God, I have you guys to listen and care. Mikes cancer and Death, Melissa and Dakota leaving my life... i ABSOLUTELY know, without you guys, i would have had an almost impossible time getting thru any of it.
    Im sorry she has made this decision, and Im glad you have decided to stay.. This place is so so unique. i have alot of friends, alot of different circles of friends, but there is NO WHERE for me that is as calming, un judgmental and safe as it is here... if I couldnt tell my deepest and darkest sorrows or my happiest news here, i would be lost..
    Just know, whether i am on here everyday or once a year, all of you cross my mind daily and if one day i hit on my bookmark for here and it is gone.. i truly dont know what i would do.. its like a beacon for me.. its HOME..
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2015

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