How does your family do the gift exchange? My family is pretty big. My dad has three brothers and they all have kids etc. We usually draw names and have a children gift exchange and an adult gift exchange. The thing is my family mainily has nov-dec birthdays so on top of getting christmas gifts we get birthday gifts to and its getting to be quit costly, a lot of us our struggling right now- My cousins are all pre teens-I'm the oldest out of the group of cousins(i'm 30) and I feel that christmas should be about more than getting presents and i want to teach my younger children that. I had asked my grandma if we could so something different for the exchange. I thought that we could do it for families- one family draw another families name and get the whole family something- or we could do a white elephant exchange. Now I am worried if my grandma brings this up the rest of my family will find out and it will make them upset. Do you guys have any other ideas???
Christmas Gift Exchange question
- Thread starter HolidayAngel
- Start date
Years ago we ran into the same conflict.
What I did was spoke to everyone involved (some by phone, others we where able to meet as a group) and said “I think we need to talk about the holidays”. It was very positive, a majority where feeling the same and with help from the CC Holiday Value Worksheet the consensus was that Christmas gifts are for KIDS, and that the most important holiday aspects we all agreed upon was visiting and eating!
So what we do is: the kids receive gifts from everyone, we do not exchange between adults.
Christmas cards are given and time is spent together or phone calls made for those too far away to see. An ounce of your time is usually valued more then a pound of presents. WFM
Good luck :leprechaun:
What I did was spoke to everyone involved (some by phone, others we where able to meet as a group) and said “I think we need to talk about the holidays”. It was very positive, a majority where feeling the same and with help from the CC Holiday Value Worksheet the consensus was that Christmas gifts are for KIDS, and that the most important holiday aspects we all agreed upon was visiting and eating!
So what we do is: the kids receive gifts from everyone, we do not exchange between adults.
Christmas cards are given and time is spent together or phone calls made for those too far away to see. An ounce of your time is usually valued more then a pound of presents. WFM
Good luck :leprechaun:
For my side of the family:
My grandma & papa get gifts for their kids, the grandkids and great-grandkids. Sometime soon their 4 children get togther and draw names. However many people you have in your family (includes spouse, but not boyfriend/girlfriend) that's how many names you get. We keep a limit of $25 for each person you draw. So without counting the grandparents we have 22 names to draw from (I think I got them all!) - we will get 3 of them. It's always exciting to see who's name we get.
My husbands side: There are 3 sons - the oldest has 3 children and they live in Hawaii, youngest (that's my hubby) - we have 1 child. They have decided to only send gifts to the children. Their dad gives the adults $100 each.
My grandma & papa get gifts for their kids, the grandkids and great-grandkids. Sometime soon their 4 children get togther and draw names. However many people you have in your family (includes spouse, but not boyfriend/girlfriend) that's how many names you get. We keep a limit of $25 for each person you draw. So without counting the grandparents we have 22 names to draw from (I think I got them all!) - we will get 3 of them. It's always exciting to see who's name we get.
My husbands side: There are 3 sons - the oldest has 3 children and they live in Hawaii, youngest (that's my hubby) - we have 1 child. They have decided to only send gifts to the children. Their dad gives the adults $100 each.
When we were kids my parents just bought the gift for each child from all of the others. Eventually we decided we wanted to play a part in this and drew names. This didn't work too well because there was an age gap of 10 years and some of us didn't get along. Some would purposefully give each other bad gifts to try to ruin it. So, we changed to each person buying for every other. This is expensive, however. We usually try to limit it to $20-30 each. The ironic thing is we're kind of back to the original idea because my parents usually end up picking up gifts for us to give each other because we just don't know what to get. lol.
I like your idea of one family buying for another. I agree, it is tough to be the one who speaks up and requests a change, but maybe others are hoping for a change this year too?
I like your idea of one family buying for another. I agree, it is tough to be the one who speaks up and requests a change, but maybe others are hoping for a change this year too?
This is what my grandma came up with. She went ahead and decieded to do an elephant gift exchange but we have to buy the gifts from either the thrift store or places like dollar tree, family dollar, etc and its somewhere between 5 and 10 dollars and the christmas party is going to focus more on food, and the other games we play.
Well, I'm sorry to say I have very little advice for you. My extended family, although not real big (13), insist on buying each other individual gifts. I plan/shop all year for bargains and our family is more financially fortunate than the rest so I tried to suggest we draw names and make it more of a family event (openning them together). They don't plan/shop all year and actually make fun of me, but they don't need to be spending the money, much less in such a concentrated time frame. (going in debt each year) They just really can't afford it.
Needless to say I was the "enemy" trying to ruin Christmas traditions. The funny thing was I was trying to help them, at the time I was finished Christmas shopping and willing to adjust without them even knowing it.
BUT, If I had my choice I would draw names or have a white elephant type exchange. A friend's family buys $20-$25 gift cards and they have a white elephant exchange. For a work party one year we did the "story exchange". you start with everyone either picking a present or holding their own. Then I read a story I made up with them passing to the direction read (left, right, across, etc.). It was fun and there were no hard feelings of people "stealing" their gift.
Needless to say I was the "enemy" trying to ruin Christmas traditions. The funny thing was I was trying to help them, at the time I was finished Christmas shopping and willing to adjust without them even knowing it.
BUT, If I had my choice I would draw names or have a white elephant type exchange. A friend's family buys $20-$25 gift cards and they have a white elephant exchange. For a work party one year we did the "story exchange". you start with everyone either picking a present or holding their own. Then I read a story I made up with them passing to the direction read (left, right, across, etc.). It was fun and there were no hard feelings of people "stealing" their gift.
I am the oldest of 3 grandkids. We kids all get gifts from everyone. My Dad and my aunt do not exchange gifts, but they do buy for Grandma and Grandpa. It seems to work well for us. It's just always been that way.
we do it with my husbands brother and sisters and there families.. we just put everyones name in a hat and then you draw out how ever many people are in your family.
we use to do a seperate one for the kids and adults but last year was the first time doing it together. It went pretty well.
we use to do a seperate one for the kids and adults but last year was the first time doing it together. It went pretty well.
I have five siblings and all are married/attached. We pick names and we buy for one couple with a spending limit of $50. We've talked about adding our parents in, but not everyone is up for that yet; we've picked names as long as I can remember. At some point, we'll just buy a family gift, but I don't expect that will happen until everyone has kids. If I buy for my siblings' kids (2 girls, 3 boys), it is a small gift; this year, I'm thinking I will get them Christmas glasses if I can find a set. I don't always buy for them.
If you don't think they will be comfortable with picking names, a spending limit is a good idea. Good luck! :grouphug:
If you don't think they will be comfortable with picking names, a spending limit is a good idea. Good luck! :grouphug: