Lessons Learned 2022

[PamelaG]

Thought I'd start this thread so we can share what didn't work or needed improvement to help us out with Christmas 2023.

1. Order stamps online

I did place an online order but I didn't estimate how many I would need correctly so I ended up making TWO extra trips to the post office. For 2023, I will take the number of stamps I needed this year, add 10%, and place an online order as soon as Christmas stamps are available.

 

[Myron's Mom]

One thing so far…
This year I set aside cash for gifts for all of our service people (hair dresser, etc) starting in January. Husband and I picked a generous amount and figured if we didn’t use it all we weren’t out anything. I also set aside for the holiday lottery tickets and the local made chocolate I planned to buy. This worked perfect for us. After we took our pastor friends out for our annual fancy Christmas dinner last week husband suggested we plan for annual dinner too. So that’s what we’ll do.

 

[Lori K]

Here's my starting reminders for 2023. I'm sure I'll add things over the next 2 weeks.

1. Schedule/make decisions re: major household projects for earlier in the autumn; don't wait until the holidays to do these things.
2. Order/purchase holiday stamps as soon as they come out.
3. Begin purchasing gifts (even gift cards) earlier in the season, or as soon after getting the "hint" from a family member.
4. Schedule "baking day" at Thanksgiving, so DD can arrange her vacation time, and allowing cookie/bread gifts that need to ship to go with ample time for delivery.

 

[Miss JoDee]

I like this thread!

1. For my family the meal doesn't matter to them. They were just happy to be together.
2. Plan all foods to be simple and gluten free as much a possible. ( Avoid items that are not gluten free)
3. A nacho or baked potato bar will work best for my family.
4. Make a list of food items to go on the table so they are not forgotten. Cross item off list or assign some one to do it.
5. I liked having everything done by Thanksgiving which means I start the HGP in Early August.
6. Complete the Stocking Countdown to Christmas for dgds before starting HGP

 

[sweetpumkinpye]

*I need to rethink the HGP. Because we were on holidays for most of October I fell behind and never picked it back up.
*Shopping all year round for grocery items was a great benefit. I have a full stockpile of items needed for Christmas so will work on that again.
*Worked extra for most of December so will need to keep on top of this next year and ensure I am ready to go.

 

[Minta]

Oh this year was and still is a hot mess ..

1. Be better organized - getting a desktop planner
2. Starting in January - spend part of each weekend purging and decluttering. Going to make a list of closets, rooms, garage and attic. This task will be difficult since a lot of my dad's and MIL belongs are in our garage and we lost both of them in the past 2 years. We already gave family several opportunities to claim items.
3. Modify HGP around marching band schedule in the fall
4. Get Christmas cards done in Nov
5. Schedule time for wrapping on Nov/Dec.
6. Save even more money each month in the Christmas Club.
7. re-evaluate plans, lists and goals throughout the year.

 

[PamelaG]

Save even more money each month in the Christmas Club.

Isn't that the truth? Everywhere you turn this year, prices have gone up so who knows what it will be like next year?

 

[sweetpumkinpye]

6. Save even more money each month in the Christmas Club.

I direct debit $60 a fortnight to my account, I may put it up to $65. $5 is not a big difference every fortnight but will make a big difference at Christmas.

 

[Myron's Mom]

And postage is going up in January again! I’m wondering if we will see another increase in July too? I may order Christmas stamps now for next year.

 

[Ahorsesoul]

And postage is going up in January again! I’m wondering if we will see another increase in July too? I may order Christmas stamps now for next year.

I did buy some international stamps for next year so hoping they will be ok. I will see how many regular stamps I have.

 

[luludou]

Well I've been quite sick the last few weeks and have run out of time for some cleaning but mostly it's gifts and food which I'm behind on.
Next year all gifts must be ready before Nov.15.

 

[Holiday_Mom]

This task will be difficult since a lot of my dad's and MIL belongs are in our garage and we lost both of them in the past 2 years.

Minta, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad and MIL.

I need to set boundaries...again...sigh... Work was out of control from March on. We're all near our breaking point. I was feeling it in September and shared it with the team. They were in agreement. We were in a grant writing challenge that we ended up losing. Co-worker 1, who's sister died and whom she cared for, was out for 3 weeks. Then about 3 weeks after that, Co-worker 2's wife delivered their baby 3 months early. He's on a leave of absence until February, although he hinted that he may not return. We've been doing his work and our own work since the first week of November. We had a big end of year push and now we are all slowing down for Christmas. We are exhausted.

Overall, I was doing well with HHP until I got sick. Then I started to feel resentment that I was doing work for others to make them happy at the expense of my own happiness. Resentment is a sure sign for me to take care of me and my needs. That's what I've been doing this week.

 

[Lori K]

Minta, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad and MIL.

I need to set boundaries...again...sigh... Work was out of control from March on. We're all near our breaking point. I was feeling it in September and shared it with the team. They were in agreement. We were in a grant writing challenge that we ended up losing. Co-worker 1, who's sister died and whom she cared for, was out for 3 weeks. Then about 3 weeks after that, Co-worker 2's wife delivered their baby 3 months early. He's on a leave of absence until February, although he hinted that he may not return. We've been doing his work and our own work since the first week of November. We had a big end of year push and now we are all slowing down for Christmas. We are exhausted.

Overall, I was doing well with HHP until I got sick. Then I started to feel resentment that I was doing work for others to make them happy at the expense of my own happiness. Resentment is a sure sign for me to take care of me and my needs. That's what I've been doing this week.

That's exactly what led me to retire early -- I was a one-person Dept. and it was too much work and I had no back-up in case I got sick or needed time away. I was off 2 weeks when DH passed and one near-complete project was finished and nothing else. We missed several deadlines during that time for critical 3- to 5-year contracts. Everyone knew the risk of not having trained back-up and I'd been asking for additional help for 3 years, with no firm committment. When I learned just before Labor Day that part-time clerical support was being put into the FY budget, I was done. Busiest times were October and late Dec-thru Jan. and March. If it wasn't cut in the budget process, it would have been late Jan. before the position would have even been posted and probably late Feb. before the position was filled, meaning 3 "cycles" on my own. Resignation was submitted my first day back after Labor Day. I have stayed on as a contract worker, with exceptionally limited hours for the last 3 years, and was just offered an extension for 1st quarter 2023. 15 hours/month works fine for me, and I am only handling training support now. Sometimes, your own health has to take precedence. Take time to take care of you!

 

[sweetpumkinpye]

I direct debit $60 a fortnight to my account, I may put it up to $65. $5 is not a big difference every fortnight but will make a big difference at Christmas.

Have changed direct debit so will start the new year at the new amount.

 

[homemade4me]

Start baking and decorating earlier....time goes by to fast....
Laurie
Simplify

 

[Lori K]

Here's my starting reminders for 2023. I'm sure I'll add things over the next 2 weeks.

1. Schedule/make decisions re: major household projects for earlier in the autumn; don't wait until the holidays to do these things.
2. Order/purchase holiday stamps as soon as they come out.
3. Begin purchasing gifts (even gift cards) earlier in the season, or as soon after getting the "hint" from a family member.
4. Schedule "baking day" at Thanksgiving, so DD can arrange her vacation time, and allowing cookie/bread gifts that need to ship to go with ample time for delivery.

Add to list --
5. Determine who is hosting what (and WHO -- i.e. who will have MOM for the holiday? Does she need to be transported here, or will she celebrate with family in Michigan?) well in advance of the holiday.
6. Reconsider Christmas Eve celebration with long-time friends. As much as I enjoy their company, the group has become a bit fragmented, and they can no longer seat a large group in their dining room. We ended up sitting with a couple of other younger guests at their kitchen counter, rather than with the hosts, who sat with their kids and another couple. Perhaps do Christmas Eve here???

 

[AnnieClaus]

I so relate to many of you! Here are mine:
I definitely need to be more mindful of using my Christmas savings account. I'm always good at it for awhile then fall off.
Especially with the costs of things- It IS important!
Leading up to Christmas was getting stressful paying for everything.
It didn't help that my employee retired the first week of December. We celebrated him and guess
who paid for everything- me, his boss! That took a hit to my pocketbook right at Christmas.

Katrina- I need a better spot for presents. I start buying, and putting bags in a corner in a spare room. Didn't like the look and feel of that.

Minta- I'm in the same boat. I ended up with a lot of my parents "stuff." I have worked on it here and there but really want to be out from
under it. We can help each other. I'm planning on participating more in the Declutter Club here in 2023.

Mary- So relate to you and boundaries. My Fall was out of control and I am needing to stick close to home for awhile.
I also struggle with resentment. When I put my needs aside to do something with or for someone I am resentful to that person.
Is that fair? When I don't even express my needs?
A guy in my goals group said he has learned, "The more you get of me, you also get less of me." I liked that.
One good thing- Got an invitation to go up to Phoenix for New Years.
I said, "No."

I also want to do the HGP continuously through the year.

This is a good thread.

Annie

 

[halimer]

DS is insisting that I only give one present for Hanukkah and one for Christmas. "They don't need anymore stuff" even when I get them what they want.

 

[sweetpumkinpye]

DS is insisting that I only give one present for Hanukkah and one for Christmas. "They don't need anymore stuff" even when I get them what they want.

I would struggle with this personally. I have cut back dramatically over the years. DD and DS used to get 20 presents each as they were the only 2 at home and it meant that under the tree was full.
Now that we have DSIL and the kids have grown we have cut that to 10 presents each. Mind you some of them are really simple gifts EG: DSIL gets a bag with 6 cans of his favourite soft drink and a packet of Pringles. One of DDs's presents maybe some hair mask and hair ties.

 

[sweetpumkinpye]

I need to put more effort into things. It is hard to explain but I need to tweak a few things.
I need to make more effort in setting the table for Christmas morning breakfast.
I need to arrange the presents under the tree better. There seemed to be too many for DS before I got to one for DD or DSIL.
I need to remember to take photos at Christmas both here and at Mum's house.
I need to take a bit more effort in making the parcels look nice. DD does not like bow and ribbons because of the environmental impact, Mum loves bows and ribbons on every parcel. I need to find the balance.